The abuse is not your fault. No matter how guilty you feel, you did not cause your abuse.
Marriage is not a license for sex gratification when or as desired. The word "no" is all you should ever have to say. No one, including a married woman, should be forced to have sex against her will.
Daughters and sons first learn proper female/male behavior at home. Often, that is all they ever learn. And that is usually where they learn abuse.
Always remember: respect is another word for love. You deserve respect in a relationship and should leave any relationship where respect is not shown.
The abuse is not, repeat, not your fault. No one deserves this treatment. Nothing you have ever done justifies physical, verbal, sexual, or emotional abuse.
Developing interests and close relationships outside the realm of your spouse/lover will help you escape from an abusive person. Repeat this over and over to yourself: "Abuse does not get better with time--it only gets worse, much worse." Verbal abuse always escalates. Physical abuse always escalates.
As bizarre as it is to think that a single person could stay in a relationship with and even marry an abusive person, it happens often. It happens to men as well as women.
However, most abusers will try to stop you from doing this. In fact, many abusers start down the road victimization by cutting you off from outside relationships and support.
In fact, when your lover or spouse does things against your wishes "for your own good," take this as a signal to watch out! The next step is excessive control, a form of emotional abuse; then the next step can, and probably will be, physical abuse.